Issue #22: Psychic Readings + Dopamine Bedding
A Muse Spotlight with Ora Mer, Short Reads for at the Bar, and More. ✨
A note: This is a longer missive, so you may have to expand if reading in an email browser that truncates. x
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Growing up in the Catholic Church, I’ve spent a lot of time contemplating the idea of angels. Ones in stained glass windows with cobalt blue wings illuminated by the sun, hearing about angel Gabriel who was so favored by God he was sent to inform Mary she would be carrying the son of the highest, and, of course, lots of faith were put into one's guardian angels — angels who were assigned to protect and guide us from the other realm.
Though I’m not a member of the Catholic Church, I am spiritual, and my love for angels has stuck with me. I believe in angels who are sight unseen, protecting us and divinely guiding us, there for us when called upon, and I also believe that angels can be people just like you and me.
The Oxford Dictionary defines an angel as a spiritual being believed to act as an attendant, agent, or messenger of God.
You see, I was contemplating this the other day when I was absolutely frazzled.
I had a 2:30 appointment and found myself sprinting off the train at 2:32. If you know me, you know that if I’m not early, I’m late, so this was super uncomfortable! I was huffing and puffing my way down long city blocks + found myself navigating my swinging bag through throngs of the weekend shopping crowd on Lexington Avenue.
When I ran into my building, I barely looked my doorman’s way, and when I saw someone coming for the elevator, I pretended not to see.
I’m a bit ashamed to write this now as it’s out of character, and I try to be the person who always has a smile or a spare moment to do a little dance in the elevator doorway to reopen the closing doors, but that day, I simply didn’t. I chose not to.
I was busy, thank you very much!
Instead, a man plunged his arm into the elevator door opening, and I, annoyed, waited for the doors to reopen and then close once more.
I exasperatingly removed my AirPods, and he smiled + asked how my day was. I mumbled whatever reply I gave and asked how his day had been going.
He replied with an ear-to-ear, full-toothed grin and told me that whenever he got off the train Uptown, he couldn’t help but be happy. He explained how he loved looking at the buildings, how the sun was shining that day, and the unseasonable warmth. As he was exiting, he turned to me and said, “I hope you have a good day too!” I agreed about the beauty of the day; we both smiled and parted ways.
The whole interaction likely lasted no more than one minute, but it completely altered the course of my day.
That man was an angel reminding me to slow down, enjoy the ride, and sink into the moments I find myself in rather than racing to ones that haven’t arrived. He nudged me to smile, plunge my hand into the shutting elevator door for another, and appreciate the sun on a bright February day.
That person was just a person like you or me. I don’t know him well, but I know he must make mistakes, and he undoubtedly has had rough moments, too. But to me, he was an angel.
A sign that any of us can be the cause for a better day, an easier moment, a reason to choose joy — no matter how those we touch choose to define us.
Big hugs,
Kayli
University of Wyoming, American Heritage Center // Marc Fishman // Boston Public Garden Angel Statue // Sophia Novosel Poster
I love the simple joy of reading a book in one sitting. I’ve been known to pour a piping hot bath, sit in a window seat at my local wine bar, or settle into a booth at a coffee shop and read an entire book. It feels entirely luxurious and also gives off what the kids call “main character energy” — or I guess what we here can call “my own muse” energy.
Is there anything more lovely than seeing a woman completely content and immersed in a world that brings her joy? I’m not sure!
I recently started keeping a list on my phone of short reads that I can easily toss into my tote and devour in one or two sittings.
Need a few recs yourself? Here’s what’s on my TBR.
Wild Swims by Dorothy Parker: This 128-page read is comprised of 14 short stories that dive into the complexity of the human experience.
A Sport and a Pastime by James Salter: You’ll notice that a couple of the books on my list right now are set in France. That’s because I simply love France and crave going there, whether by AirFrance or words on a page. This 208-page book is set in Provence in the 1960s and details the love affair between a Yale dropout + a French ingenue.
Before the Coffee Gets Cold by Toshikazu Kawaguchi: I’m not usually a time travel trope girly, but after hearing about the masterful work that is Kawaguchi, looks like I need to try to be! A 272-page (okay, longer than the rest, but I saw it IRL + it looked small?) book, this storyline takes the stories of four strangers that go to a coffee shop and are served something other than an iced Americano: the opportunity to go back in time.
Bonjour Tristesse by Francoise Sagan: I saw this while browsing one of my favorite bookstores ever (McNally Jackson in the Seaport), and it immediately caught my eye. This 160-page classic is about a French girl on the brink of womanhood. Apparently, she starts prying into her father’s love life, and it doesn’t work out too well for her. Color me intrigued!
Sula by Toni Morrison: If you’re a reader and don’t subscribe to
’s newsletter, , go + subscribe!! She recently started a brilliant series where she goes on a book date with someone and has really lovely conversations with them, with the center focus being, you guessed it, books. On a recent book date, she spoke with Tahirah Hairston, who raved about Morrison’s book, Sula. A 192-page book that revolves around the evolution of two women and their relationship to one another, this floated to the top of my list.One thing about me is I love bedding (!!!)
The crisp sheets, the different patterns and colors, stretching out my flannel red + green fitted sheet in December, slipping into my creamy ivory Brooklinen sheets after a day spent at the beach for an afternoon nap…
Bedding is another area of my life where I bask in intentionality. I enjoy carefully choosing the color over a feeling I want to experience, discovering an unopened handstitched pillowcase in the back of a thrift store, and evoking nostalgia for sleepovers at my Grandma’s house or a set I especially loved as a child.
Back in January, I started a Note on my phone (ok, do all women live by their Notes app??) with small goals for 2024. One was to write more love letters, another was to host more often, and another was to refresh our bedding in March as a treat to welcome Spring!
For Christmas, my mother-in-law gifted us a gorgeous light yellow Brooklinen duvet that, sadly, is no longer sold. However, you can get a super similar one here. Now, it’s time to find pillow shams and possibly a couple of other bedding additions I’ve had my eye on to go along with it!
Here are a few ideas I’ve found so far on my search.
West Elm x Rhode Pillow Shams // Pillow Sheet Set // Buffy Duvet Cover // Gingham Pillow Cases // Euro Pillow Inserts Floral Lumbar Pillow // Embroidered Pillow Cases
You can browse more home bedding favorites, here.
Update:
I ended up refreshing our bedding before publishing, and this is how it turned out. I absolutely love it!
Items Include: The Rhode Pillow Shams // These Euro Pillows + Pillow Shams // These Fabulous Custom Embroidered Pillow Cases // These Super Affordable Sheets // A Duvet Very Similar to This One // The DvF for Target Lumbar Pillow
Want to Sell a Book or Release an Album? Better Start a TikTok: I devoured this piece by journalist Rebecca Jennings for Vox. For many moons now, I’ve toyed with how to grow this very brand. I love writing and being in community with all of you, but to reach more people, do I have to start making videos? My ultimate career goal is to write a book, but nowadays, must I have a significant Instagram presence to even get through the doors at a publishing house? Artists used to toile over their art — the ebbs and flows of creativity and inspiration understood by those who appreciated it. However, in current times, it feels as if you need to follow the mass trends somehow and, in tandem, create something completely original, and you better do that daily! I’ll admit that this piece didn’t offer any solutions or inventive ideas for breaking the cycle, but it did make me feel less alone.
10-Minute Meditation to Freshen Up and Reset Yourself: I recently came across this meditation, and it really helped me reset a morning that had begun rather wobbly. The creator’s voice is calming, I appreciated the somatic cues (“reach up and stretch”), and the 10-minute time was long enough to give me a real perspective shift without adding to an already long to-do list.
Protein Almond Milk: I mostly drink cow's milk (gasp!) but have been adding this Unsweetened Protein Almond Milk to my grocery cart lately, and it has been a hit! The taste is sublime when poured into my morning coffee or matcha, and the extra protein helps me stay fuller until lunchtime rolls around. I get mine at Whole Foods, but there’s a deal on Amazon where you get six for $23, which seems like a better deal if you’re intrigued!
Recently, I met with Rachel of Ora Mer, and we dove into an incredible psychic reading. I call it a psychic reading, but instead of the fortune teller with crystal ball images you might be conjuring, instead imagine a best friend who has her intuitive gifts honed + is ready to chat about whatever comes up, taking in the information she receives from your spirit team.
From the moment Rachel met me in the lobby of her pop-up space, I felt her radiate such a warm, safe energy. This is a must for people working in the healing space!
As we began my reading, she made sure to note that anything that didn't serve me could go right out the window and that, ultimately, I was my own best healer—a notion I find incredibly vital. After all, we’re all intuitive beings.
Upon starting the session, I felt she was deeply connected to my angels and that what came through was such a beautiful transmission of guidance in the realm of my career while acknowledging the work I've been doing. It felt like a hug! Near the end, she mentioned something that I hadn't mentioned to her but have my whole life felt deeply drawn to + I could have cried then and there.
What a beautiful exchange of energy.
Rachel is so gifted at holding a safe space, making people feel seen, and using her gifts for the greater good of all involved, that I just knew I had to share her magic with The Intentional Muse community.
I hope you enjoy our conversation. 🤍
Kayli: Rachel, I'm so excited to be able to sit down with you today. We just had such a beautiful reading that I'm so, so thrilled about. I’d first like to ask, how did you first feel your intuitive gifts surface. What was that experience like for you?
Rachel: Oh, this is such a good question. It's interesting because I don't know that I felt my intuitive gifts first as much as I felt my psychic and mediumship abilities first. So, I feel like my entry into this world was pretty intense. I first became aware of these gifts after my grandma passed away when I was five. It was really rooted in grief and trauma for me and my family. It was a very intense entry into the world of intuition, and more intensely into mediumship and psychic abilities.
I feel like, too, at such a young age, you are more connected to the other side, and everybody has this within them. As you grew older, did you ever feel like tamping down those gifts or like you couldn't share them freely?
Yeah, I did. I dampened the gifts as much as I could. A huge part of how I was introduced to these abilities was so much rooted in grief. Part of being a kid, too, and making sense of the world is also recognizing and learning about emotions. My parents and my family, in general, were really supportive of, you know, when I would say things or even encouraged me.
As a kid, I just started to recognize that, oh, when I talk about grandma, it makes people happy. And when I don't, they're sad. And so I think that that started to really play into my sense of worth. Now, kind of looking back and taking a lot of responsibility in the realm of wanting to be a person that makes people happy— it definitely took a toll on me.
My mom reminded me of this, but I ended up developing a perfectly circular bald spot on the crown of my head when I was a kid, around this time, because I was just forcing a connection so much at a certain point. If you know anything about chakras, the crown of your head is a divine connection, a connection to spirits and guides. I was like a perfectly circular spot. It really started to take a physical and energetic toll on me, to the point where it started to feel bad. I think from then on, probably from about seven years old, I completely shut it down as much as I could. But even then, I would have certain moments throughout my childhood and teenage years that I just, like, couldn't keep it down.
I would just feel things or know things or have dreams of being places where I would end up or things that would end up happening.
I tried to do as much as I could. I became really secretive and really private about it. And so it's been quite the journey since then.
How did you find that balance? What age were you? Take us through that a little bit. Was there a situation that made you want to tap back into these gifts in a more aligned, healthier way?
I feel like I’m starting to take notice of these things, connecting a little bit more to my intuition after forcing and feeling disconnected for so long. Of course, there's other mental health stuff that happened that kind of disconnects us from ourselves, and so I think as I started moving through therapy, especially in middle school / high school.
That opened a huge door for me, showing me what it felt like to connect with myself, especially after shutting down for so many years in every way, including these gifts and spirituality. Early in college, I worked at a grief center, which was right next door to this Reiki healer. I was really familiar with Eastern medicine and had done Reiki, gone to an herbalist as a kid, and done acupuncture and all these things. My parents are immigrants from Eastern Europe, so it wasn't foreign to me. It was something that I just felt myself getting kind of curious about, and I feel like I was always just naturally drawn to spiritual things, but it was something I still kept super private, and I just remember this woman who had just opened up a Reiki studio next to where I was working, she walked up and introduced herself to a few people and just looked at me and winked at me and just gave me this knowing nod. I just felt like, “This means something,” and I ended up booking a session with her… That opened a huge door for me.
Astrology was another door. It felt like these doors opened in a very short period of time, early on in college, basically throughout college for me. That kind of allowed me to reenter more firmly into spiritual things, which is such a home space for me, and I think it's where my soul was just so naturally drawn, and that's kind of where I've been ever since.
It is such a gift to have a family where you can talk openly about like you said, topics that are more taboo. I definitely resonate with that. I think as you grow older, you especially feel so grateful for growing up in a supportive family environment.
Yeah, it all added just so much depth. I am very, very grateful for that. I love that.
I truly believe that we all have intuitive gifts, and our answers are always within us. Nobody can take our sovereignty away from us. Everything's just waiting to be revealed, worked with, and played with.
I was wondering if you have any advice for people looking to get to know themselves in this way.
I really do firmly believe that we're all intuitive, magical, powerful, gifted, and amazing in our own unique ways.
I think the first place that I would always recommend people start is just to listen to themselves. While this may be easy for some, depending on where you are in your journey, it can also be one of the hardest things that you can do.
If you've ever struggled with mental health and you are familiar with what it feels like to feel numb and disconnected from yourself, allowing yourself even some space to listen and to feel like you're worthy of being listened to by yourself, I feel like is one of the, simplest, biggest, most important things you can do, because no matter what you go through in life — and we all go through so many ebbs and flows and so many transformations — that's always the thing to come back to.
Just to listen and to feel like you're worthy of being listened to... That's beautiful.
I think, especially in our society today, women are told to be the good girl, sit down, and be quiet— you know, stick to our societal structure.
Slowly but surely, change is being made… in some areas more than others. How are you at such an evolved, lovely stage? You're such an incredible person to get to know. How are you even still working through this feeling of knowing your own worthiness and living in that space and living in a place, especially like New York City, where there’s so much urge to go go go? Living in your femininity, knowing your worth, and believing in yourself in that way is such a gift.
It has been a really long journey, and it’s still ongoing. I think I'm in a really, really great space right now, and I think that there's always more to grow and evolve into. And, I think in low moments, I kind of allow myself to sit in that, and hold myself through that because I think that how we move through those moments is more telling than when things are like all sunshine and roses and great and so expansive…
We all go through that, and we all go through those spaces of abundance and momentum and that feels so good, but I feel like what's most important for me is how I hold myself when things are shit, when things are not great, when things are really hard and just allowing myself to feel that, rather than pushing that down, rather than invalidating myself and forcing myself to try to feel something that I genuinely don't feel. I just allow myself not to feel good.
I allow myself to feel insecure if that's how I'm feeling. I allow myself to have those moments because I know that they'll pass. I think holding myself through them, validating the fears and insecurities, and asking where they’re coming from and why they’re coming up is more important than a huge chapter, like momentum flow, huge opportunity.
That's the most important thing I can do for myself because I think that's kind of that feeling of home, of being able to hold yourself through anything and kind of coming back to that.
Oh my God. Yes, that was incredibly beautiful, and I completely agree. I just feel being able to find home within ourselves also makes those rockier pieces so much easier. Yes, it has to do with the work and asking yourself those difficult questions, and I can go on and on, but it's also so much about age and that natural maturation process. At least, I think so.
Kind of pivoting. One thing that really stuck out to me when I first started seeing Ora Mer pop up on my Instagram and my local spaces was how approachable I found you and your work. Your approach to the divine and your work are so accessible to everyone in a way that I don't think people see a lot. Maybe they're used to like the more mystical spaces and the pictures with like the sound bath, which are so beautiful, and we both relate to liking those, but Ora Mer feels so down to Earth + relatable. Was that an intentional choice on your part to create such an approachable space, or was that just part of who you were and how you're showing up?
I think it's a little bit of both. I think that I am somebody who loves the woo-woo. I love the spiritual, love the divine, ethereal energy. It's incredible. It's amazing. I love to be in those spaces, but I'm also somebody who deeply connects to the human experience and emotions in depth, and what it is to be human and to have trauma and triggers and go through ups and downs. For me, a real struggle that I have or that I see in people or in clients is that all-or-nothing mentality.
We're so rooted in the human, the physical, and we're completely disconnected from intuition, spirituality, or any of those pieces of who we are. Or, you know, it's the complete other way around, where we're so rooted and so tapped into the spiritual divine energy that we sometimes deny our own humanity and our own humanness.
It's really hard to be in an all-or-nothing space. The nature of the work that I do and that I want to do and the space that I want to reinforce in the community that I hold and in one-on-one spaces and anything that I do or create is honoring all that we are.
That includes being spiritual, being intuitive, being magical, being like the most incredible person. It also includes being human and having the experiences we've had, holding ourselves through it all, and seeing all that we are rather than just these parts and pieces of our existence.
I think that's so important because we're just marketed everything right now, like, oh, to do that, like start working with angel cards, pull a card a day, or start going to an energy healer and clearing your chakras. And those things are all fine and great. But I love that what you said is completely free and accessible.
I also think gathering in community is just so important. Back in the day, women were gathering under the red tent. We were raising children in these communities, helping one another through big life transitions. Unfortunately, in our American culture today, that's something that isn't quite as valued.
I know community is such a big part of Ora Mer’s mission. I would love to ask you what you would say are the most important aspects of creating a safe, loving space where people feel both held and able to tackle whatever they'd like to within the space of your gathering?
A big part of it is how we each show up individually and recognize our experiences, our lived experiences, and our identities. And that's a huge part of the work that I do: recognizing those pieces of who we are that are inextricably linked to our identity, to our soul, to our being.
I think any room or space we enter into, having that awareness of this space that you're coming from, allows us to hold one another so much more and so much better because I think when we see ourselves, it's much easier to see others and to see others in the way that they want to be seen and connected to and felt.
That's why I think that interpersonal work is just the most important thing. Not only does it inform how we hold and see ourselves, but it also informs how we move through the world. It also informs how capable we are of holding and seeing others rather than sort of maybe projecting what we want or how we want to be seen onto someone else.
I always love to ask, what are three things you’re loving right now?
Since moving to NYC, I've had so many incredible opportunities. I quickly realized I wasn't living or 'playing the part' of the Empire Building/Boss CEO that I am and desire to be.
I quickly invested in these things that are so simple but are those very things that make me feel most confident when doing readings, going out, working at events, meeting new people, etc.!
1. My Drybar Double Shot Oval Brush *for the most gorgeous at-home blowout*
2. My Saie 'Dip' Lip Oil & Charlotte Tilbury Pillow Talk Combo (it's either this or a red lip for me!)
3. My business cards & my bright red card holder (gifted by my best friend) that I always have on me! I actually placed a business card order in December and already had to restock which was the most INCREDIBLE FEELING!
You can read the complete interview with Rachel, here, and learn more about Ora Mer / book a session with Rachel, here.
Thanks for your time, Rachel!