Issue #25: A Relaxed Woman - Imagine That.

Relaxing Into the Moment, a Stain Removing Godsend, and a NYC Event.

Born with my umbilical cord wrapped around my neck, I literally came out of the womb wound up too tight. 

I spent the last twenty-some years grasping for control. Never wanting to fail, my OCD took hold of a misstep and made it stickier than sushi rice. I’m notorious for getting to places extremely early, factoring in time for unexpected traffic or a miscalculation, and if you had told me five years ago that I’d be 29 and entering a new chapter of my career, my foundation more wobbly than it was in that moment, I probably would have thrown up.

Honesty.

Yet, here I am, somehow completely okay. Better than okay. 

Free. 

Or at least, getting there. Moment by moment.

Is it leaving early adulthood behind and settling into the knowledge that life changes and evolves + that’s just how it goes?

Is it my being in a marriage that’s a true partnership? Having someone able to bear the load with me?

Was it the pandemic forcing me to deal with the unexpected?

It could certainly be the therapy, the mentorship groups, the coaching certifications, and the being in community I’ve intentionally sought out.

I wouldn’t put it past the pile of self-help books I’ve devoured.

Or the conversations with friends and sisters that have felt like Church. 

Really, I think it’s a mix of all of those things. 

I need not be able to identify the exact science of how my shoulders have relaxed, how I can look into the mirror and have more grace for myself, how I can deal with a change in plans, and not have my immediate reaction be one of disarray. 

I don’t need to solve that equation to be proud of where I am right now — the shackles of control loosened. 

I just need to keep dancing the dance of each day. 

With acceptance, with grace, loosening just a little bit more…

Will you join me?

x Kayli

Practicing Yoga in Central Park by Leonard McCombe The LIFE Picture Collection/Shutterstock, 1961. // Girls Twirling // Nuria Val for Vanidad, 2017 // Veruschka by Franco Rubartelli, 1968

Therapists Trade the Couch for the Great Outdoors by Christina Caron for NYT: This article from the New York Times really fascinated me. As someone who feels calmed by the sea, more connected in the woods, and starts to go stir crazy if inside too long, I see huge benefits of therapy in nature and would love to partake in it myself someday. Humans have historically spent much of their days outdoors, and yet such a sharp turn has been made in recent years toward cubicles and screens. I wonder what would happen if society took small steps toward a more balanced approach? Walking meetings, morning time in the sun, sitting with your partner by your nearest body of water to have discussions… food for thought.

Grandma’s Secret Spot Stain Remover: Last year Aaron and I were at a wedding where one of the guests made the grave mistake of spilling wine on their shirt in front of us. Grave, because we had a solution we never shut up about. Within’ 3 days I’m sure said person was avoiding us because we couldn’t quit talking about the magic of Grandma’s Stain Remover! We’ve been using it for the last three years and it’s a constant reorder. We’ve used it on wine, dirt, blood, oils, vinegar, you name it + low and behold it has worked every time. Magic!

Anita de Monte Laughs Last by Xochitl Gonzalez: I was worried at first when I went to begin my book club’s latest pick, Anita de Monte Laughs Last (Bookshop, Amazon), less than a week before we were scheduled to meet. Little did I know I would finish it in two days because I couldn’t put it down! The novel goes between two different timelines showcasing young female artists, Anita and Raquel. The story twists + turns showcasing the challenges they face being female artists of color, the hardships of breaking into the elite art world, and the importance of legacy.

Manhattan may be dubbed the Concrete Jungle, but there are still so many gorgeous spots to escape the pavement. Central Park, Elizabeth Street Garden, Carl Schurz, Little Island—the list goes on—and I make it a point to visit a greenery spot often. The best part? When I slip off my shoes and ground my feet into the Earth. I’m not doing it just for kicks though! 

Grounding is the act of your body making contact with the Earth. You can lie down in a grassy patch, submerge yourself in a local lake, or as I so often do, remove your shoes and stand like a sunflower facing the sun as your toes feel the dirt beneath them. 

The benefits are aplenty: Better sleep, stress reduction, and even speedier wound healing are among the pros of connecting in this way with Mother Earth, but I also enjoy the knowing that, at that moment, I’m choosing to return to the rhythm of the natural world, momentarily leaving the hustle + bustle behind.

WHEN: May 16th @ 7:30pm

WHERE: The Incredible @krewe Flagship Store

WHAT: Connection with other amazing women, NA sips, a headshot bar, and a fireside chat on branding with my incredible cohost @thekaiyawilliams + special guest, @kiariladyboss.

✨✨✨

I always joke when people ask me where I went to school that I went to the school of the Internet.

When I first (rather unintentionally, then very intentionally) dove into the world of entrepreneurship I only had my instincts.

I watched YouTube videos, took a million and five online courses, and read approximately one hundred business books, but what REALLY has made mountains move for me is genuine connection.

I would email women I admired in business asking for a coffee date where I could ask a few questions, and clients would recommend me to their colleagues and so on… and through those generous acts my career was able to flourish.

So much of entrepreneurship is about creating authentic connections and learning as you go, and that’s why I’m so passionate about helping where I can today. During Aligned: Building Your Brand While Building Your Business, Kaiya and I will give you branding tips you can walk away + implement that night.

And who knows, you might even meet your new best friend, or person who can connect you to *that* opportunity. Anything can happen in a room that’s full of women aiming to build, not only themselves, but those around them, up — I really believe that.